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 Sick of Pain

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Prof. Akers
flight _of_angelwings
6 posters
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flight _of_angelwings

flight _of_angelwings


Female
Number of posts : 137
Age : 47
Registration date : 2007-05-12

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PostSubject: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 4:21 am

Todays not a good day and it just feels like its getting worse...I'm gonna put on some olive shanti....back in a sec...

Oh music thats better........the sound of the drums and vocals of native americans....hmmmm....going home........

anyway my pain I know its a permenent thing its a pain in the arse literally. Due to my fusing pelvis and spine its causing me all sorts of problems. The flares usually only last about nine months and I think I'm about 4 weeks in or so now. Still get good and bad days but as I sit here typing I'm rubbing my feet together to help with the pain. In bed whilst on my siode armed with pillows between my hips to keep my pelvis in line p;illow under my arms to stop my back twisintg I will rock my feet and rub my feet togehter until atw which time I fall asleep.

I'm always so good...so good coping being a mum being what I'm supposed ot be a rock for my family....This weeks been hard.

My son had his I.Q test come back showing he is mildly intelectually disabled and they wont know until time shows if he will ever be able to be fully dependant on himself...(I'm not gonna cry..they wanna come but i'll not let em...)...so thats sad but in statistics he shows that out of all kids his age he perfroms aswell as six percent of them. so he is in the top bottom six percent of boys his age......6% its so scold...so cold and so frigging dsad...I know he is specail and I love him so dearly but he's my little boy and when he gets older people are les likely to forgive a little man then and adult...society sacre me. Bloody hell got the tears..

I tried to talk to hubby but he is still in denial even four years later he still cant let him see that his boy is special...i know he is special...I'm just so scared.... Then with all my pain i blow out of proportion what I'm feeling and at times its hard to know if I'm over reacting or not. Add pcos and it means I'm going into early menopause due to my hormones...I feel literally like an old lady in body. I'm 30 the hormones of a menapausal 60 yr old, the bones and joints of a 70 yr old and the responsibilities of being a mum.

I'm hurting...the meds aint working....hubbys not home and I'm left with my thgouhts which isnt aw good combination and now no doubt if I post this I'll come back tomorrow and feel so sill and foolsih for letting myself react so badly and posting my intimate thoughts.

If only cyber hugs were able to be felt...I'd be asking for some.....

Set your tasks! so be it God but be warned you'll need to aim higher next time cause I'll bloody well climb this one and the next....

I may at times let others walk over me but I'll be damned if I let myself do it too.....
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Prof. Akers

Prof. Akers


Male
Number of posts : 120
Age : 76
Localisation : Cumbria - GB - Celebrity Member
Registration date : 2007-05-23

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 4:58 am

Flight, what can anyone say in the face of pain.
My thoughts are with you, such troubles as I have, pale into insignificance.
If kind warm thoughts are capable of crossing the ether then accept a hug from a small fat old man.
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flight _of_angelwings

flight _of_angelwings


Female
Number of posts : 137
Age : 47
Registration date : 2007-05-12

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 5:07 am

Quote :
If kind warm thoughts are capable of crossing the ether then accept a hug from a small fat old man.

Well I will take that hug....and then if you dont mind a spine, pelvis and two brand new hips....is that ok???....haha..I'll do you a swap mine 'officially' only say 30 years of kilometers on them....lol

Thanks for your thoughts. my problems are no any more severe or harsher than anyone elses but my coping mechanisms are and I do tend to moan a lot about my pain. I try not to judge ones pain against another as its just not possible.

We all have our mountains and when mines that little harder I tend to call on my friends and cyber friends just to release the emotional pain so as to help deal witht he physical...dumping some eontional alwats tends to help the physical just that bit more. I find it very very hard to ask for healing, even now surrounded by massage therapists bowen therapists journey tharpists counsellors all freinds I still cant ask for energy exchanges with them. I dont know why but so many people in a healing profession just feel uncomforatable asking for it themselves. Maybe we see it as a sign of weakness therfore not able to do our job effectively for aomeone else if we do ask for help from another?????

Thanks for your words prof, Means a lot!
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EarlofLeicester

EarlofLeicester


Male
Number of posts : 344
Age : 64
Localisation : Midgard
Registration date : 2007-05-27

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 5:10 am

Hmm, I have some experience with the problems of raising a child with disabilities. My son has Asperger's Syndrome and while that diesn't impact IQ, it does impact the part of the brain that deals with interacting with others. In layman's terms, it is social autism. From my experience,people have benn less than forgiving of my son's specialness all throughout his 17 years on the planet. I have had to fight too many battles in those 17 years which, frankly, has probably made me more bitter than I would prefer. Differences outside of the norm are really frowned upon in the northeast USA and I suspect that is the case everywhere. It has been a long and hard and painful parenthood, to be sure. If I had words of encouragement regarding his life, well, it would be that he has worked hard to take notice of his disability, and can sometimes come across as normal (when exposed to people for an hour or short periods). He is much better suited for interaction with the world then when he was, say 2 or 5 or 13. It has taken so many years but I can say that now. Things may not always be as dark as they seem now, although my son carries a lot of emotional scars with him, to be sure.
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flight _of_angelwings

flight _of_angelwings


Female
Number of posts : 137
Age : 47
Registration date : 2007-05-12

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 5:17 am

My heart of hearts tells me my son will move on into Aspergers. As he is young his officail dx is PDD_NOS and that defines autism that they cant define as the child is too young. Socailly he is doing better but he does have a very high I>Q with specific things like the make of trucks or numbers so I know within once her get futher into school and learnging he will end up offically fitting into aspergers. They are high functioning autistic people.

Its not easy, and you like me also know how hard it is with limitations and without a partner. I mean I am married but a lonley one at that...oh I must clarify lonely only due to distance were happily maried but as he drives trains he is gone for days and days and when he gets home he sleeps then leaves again so I feel like a single mum with the odd booty call.

My boy take more time and i love that about him. I love having to explain simple things like why the oven is hot and then explaining it again later and then again the next day...hehe..i do I truly love him for what he brings to my life. I just wish If I didnt have my disability I could do so much more for him than I can now.
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Milady Raka

Milady Raka


Female
Number of posts : 1128
Age : 67
Localisation : Traveller between Worlds...
Registration date : 2007-05-12

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeThu Jun 07, 2007 6:27 am

To a very special Angel...
Sick of Pain Bearhu10
from me...
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Delphina

Delphina


Female
Number of posts : 73
Age : 61
Localisation : Canada
Registration date : 2007-06-06

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeFri Jun 08, 2007 4:20 pm

I have a welling of desire to run over and give you a big hug...
Frustration makes me realize that I can not fly that far, nor swim the ocean for that long. (Other then in my mind)

But if I could...
First I would give you a big hug
Help where I could
Then I would try to make you smile
And if it didn't hurt to much, make you laugh.

So here is my cyber [[[[[HUG]]]]]

and here is a link to all that need a good laugh
[caution one needs a warped mind to get a real good laugh from this]

https://s198.photobucket.com/albums/aa292/Delphina111/donkey/?action=view&current=Never_Pull_Off_The_Road_To_Poop_6.flv

Delphina
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smallelk

smallelk


Female
Number of posts : 229
Age : 69
Localisation : Ontario, Canada
Registration date : 2007-05-12

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeFri Jun 08, 2007 4:44 pm

Good for the donkey! He doesn't poop in the man's yard does he?
ROFLMAO
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http://www.freewebs.com/smallelk/
Delphina

Delphina


Female
Number of posts : 73
Age : 61
Localisation : Canada
Registration date : 2007-06-06

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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeFri Jun 08, 2007 4:51 pm

Hi SmallElk
I just love that video Laughing
Especially seen as how we have donkeys....
Mind you, none of ours have ever done anything like that... that goodness.
flower Delphina
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Milady Raka

Milady Raka


Female
Number of posts : 1128
Age : 67
Localisation : Traveller between Worlds...
Registration date : 2007-05-12

Sick of Pain Empty
PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitimeSat Jun 09, 2007 1:17 am

I think it was love at first sight if you ask me...

ROTFL!!!!
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PostSubject: Re: Sick of Pain   Sick of Pain Icon_minitime

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